De-escalation Strategies

We all know the importance of being able to de-escalate or diffuse situations when working with students.  To avoid power struggles, try some of the strategies suggested by pathways2success.  

www.pathways2success.com 

What Boys Need...The Difficult Child

What Boys Need   A newsletter from Michael Reist www.michaelreist.ca

Difficult Child. Interesting Adult. When you’re feeling frustrated about your child’s behaviour, just remember, your difficult child is going to grow up to be an interesting adult. Wayne Dyer said, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” Qualities that are difficult in a child might serve him well as an adult.  Stubborn = strong willed, sets goals and works toward them Defiant = is confident enough to speak honestly to authority figures Disorganized = is more interested in the big picture, not a details person Doesn’t listen = focuses well on his own projects, is able to ignore distractions Argumentative = intelligent, passionate, excellent verbal skills “Difficult” is in the eyes of the beholder. A difficult child is not a problem to be solved but a mystery to be understood. All behaviour is logical. What is the deeper meaning behind the difficult behaviour? I want more freedom and control in my life. This doesn’t mean letting them have everything they want. It means giving them more freedom and control – within boundaries. I feel that no one “gets” me. What does it mean to “get” a child? It means to feel empathy for them. It means to really listen to what they’re saying. I have energy I need to burn off. Get outside. Move. Exercise. I’m bored. I don’t feel challenged. This is especially the case with highly intelligent children. I need more attention from Mom and Dad. Some children need more attention than others – within the same family. If they can’t get it in positive ways, they will get it in negative ways. Give to each according to their needs. You cannot spoil a child with love. We think of children as difficult when they do not behave in ways we like. We need to provide them with two things: freedom within structure. The 4 F’s of discipline: Few: Your list of rules should be short. These are your non-negotiables, your battles worth fighting. Put them up on the fridge door. Review them periodically. Fair: Talk about these rules as a family. What are the logical reasons behind them? Let your kids participate in this discussion rather than decreeing from above. Decide in advance what the consequences will be – ideally with buy-in from your kids. Fast: When a rule is violated, follow the “Act, don’t yak!” rule. Simply impose the consequence. No need for long sermons or lectures. Make sure the consequences have a reasonable time limit (for example, one day without the iPad), so that you can start fresh again. Firm: Listen to the push back then let it go. It’s my job to set boundaries. It’s your job to push back against them. We’re both doing our job. The daily struggle to meet the needs of a “difficult” child will be just that, a daily struggle. Take one day at a time. At the end of a bad day, rebuild the interpersonal bridge by making nurturing contact with the child. The next day, push the reset button – no grudges or references to the past. Most of all, have a sense of humour. Maybe you don’t even have a difficult child – maybe you’re a “difficult parent.” lol

"Kids Do Well If They Can"

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Alex Shevrin in Kids Do Well If They Can: A Strength Based Approach shares Dr. Ross Greene's philosophy and reminds us that students use the skills that they have and when things are not working well, we need to see what skills are lacking.

Strategies for working with Students with Challenging Behaviours

Intervention Central website lists strategies that teachers can use when working with students that present with challenging behaviours.

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Hands are Not for Hitting by Elizabeth Verdick.

A great book to help remind students that "Hands are not for Hitting" by Martine Agassi.

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Suggested Strategies for Students with Needs in the area of Self Regulation

Some suggestions for the development of self regulatory skills are provided by ETFO's Special Education Handbook:  A Practical Guide for All Teachers.

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Suggested Strategies for Students with Needs in the area of Aggression

ETFO' s "Special Education Handbook:  A Practical Guide for All Teachers", provides practical strategies for experiencing difficulties with verbal and physical aggression .

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IEPs, Behaviour Plans and Safety Plans: Why Consult with Parents?

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Parents/Guardians must be provided with opportunities to discuss issues, information, ask questions and influences outcomes before  decisions are made. Why Consult with Parents? (Behaviour Management Systems:  Practitioner Workbook).

Book: David Goes to School by David Shannon

A great story to share with children to help them understand school routines!

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Addiction, Mental Health and Crisis Service -Here 24 Seven

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Here 24 Seven is an addiction, mental health and crisis service with call anytime access.
If you know someone who:

• doesn't know where or how to get help
• feels hopeless
• withdraws from friends and family
• threatens to or talks about hurting or killing themselves or others
• increases alcohol or drug use
• engages in reckless behaviours
• is in need of support for addictions and/or mental health
• feels rage or uncontrolled anger
• sees no reason for living
• feels trapped, like there is no way out
• has dramatic mood changes
• feels anxious, agitated or unable to sleep

What is meant by Executive Functioning?

Information on Learning and Attention Concerns

The website Understood was suggested by a colleague, Paula Cerven and provides information about learning and attention concerns.  Some topics address school and learning (K-12 and beyond), friends and feelings, parents and family, as well as upcoming community events.

Thanks for sharing Paula!

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The Power of the Positive Call Home

The Power of the Positive Call Home is a great strategy for building a rapport with parents and students and assists in managing challenging behaviours.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/15LQ1f04QQkTryUveBU1c-qqpndLN0fK7OgVIRgwD5hs/edit?usp=sharing

Data Tracking Sheet for Difficult Behaviours

When a student presents with difficult behaviours, it may be helpful to track exactly what the behaviours are, when they occur and how often.  Please click here to see a Data Tracking Sheet.

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Implementing the Colloborative Problem Solving Model in your School: Is there enough time in the Day?

Misty McBreirty shares how this can be done in her video. Click on "Watch on Vimeo"..



http://vimeo.com/65594222

Conversations with Behaviourally Challenging Kids

Ross Greene's Website:  Lives in the Balance is about changing the conversation about and with behaviourally challenging kids.

http://www.livesinthebalance.org/

Reduce Stress, Anxiety and Anger in our Students

Lori Lite is the author of books designed to help children, teens and adults decrease stress, anxiety and anger. Visit her website at Stress Free Kids.  Thanks for sharing this set of resources, Faye!

http://www.stressfreekids.com/category/books

Tips on Reinforcment

The Reinforcement Tip Sheet below can be used when a student is learning a new skill or working hard to manage behaviour.

http://elearning.autism.net/?lang=en

ADHD

Classroom Tips to assist students with ADHD.

http://www.educatorstechnology.com/2014/04/two-awesome-visuals-on-adhd-for-teachers.html

Self Regulation

Teachers are trying new approaches to assist students in being "calm, alert and focused" (http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/self-regulation-technique-helps-students-focus-in-class-1.2440688).  CBC News features:  Self Regulation Technique Helps Students Focus in Class.  From this link you may also view the video on "How Does Your Engine Run?"

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Classroom Use:  Assisting students with attention and focus, reducing lethargy, reducing hyperactivity, sensory overload and coping with stress.
Allows for physical activity and a more calm and productive class.